Monday, June 20, 2011

A Letter Home: Father's Day

Dear Poppy,
Mom told us it’s Father’s Day in America, but we’re trying to keep it under wraps so Dad doesn’t ask us why he didn’t get a gift today too. We figured since it was Father’s Day in America we should write you a letter because we have a lot of things to say to you.
First off, we wish you’d never told Mom that horrible {she says funny} Peas & Honey poem. She says it every time she feeds us peas, or sees us snitching frozen peas, or any time anyone mentions peas. It drives us crazy because we don’t think peas would taste good with honey, and Mom says it’s traditional to say the poem and some day we’ll say it to our kids.  We disagree.
We’re also hoping your coming to visit soon. The reason why is we need your help! Mom keeps asking us to help sweep the driveway {she said she’d hose it down, but Dad chucked out the hose!} because she’s tired of the leaves and mud on it. We know you have a leaf blower and we figure if you come to visit you can bring it with you and have the job done in half the time {or less, we can’t decide.}
Don’t worry about getting here, we think we can do it for free. See, Mom says she hasn’t mailed Gram-Gram’s Mother’s Day Present, Danica’s birthday present, Rachel’s birthday present, or your Father’s Day present. She said it’s because she’s hoping to toss them on the back of a whale and have them take it over. So we figure when the whale arrives at your front door you can just hop on and come to us. All though Mom says the whale would never make it to your front door because you aren’t close enough to a large body of water. We disagree because he can wear a scuba diving outfit like we saw at AgFest.
That’s not all though. We really REALLY want a treehouse. Mom says that a treehouse is a great idea, but she’s not so sure our trees are big enough. We think you could do it anyway and it wouldn’t be a problem. So when you come you’ll need to bring a few tools because you know Daddy doesn’t have very many.
Mom says you love hot spicy stuff and we think you should come around when Agfest is happening. This guy there, he sells super hot stuff and we were too scared to try it. We watched Mom try it and she didn’t pass out, but we thought she might. They had levels from 0-10 and then there was one even higher then 10! We think Mom only went as high as an 8, & then she bought the 8! It has an ugly spider on it, but she swears there’s no spiders inside of it.
Speaking of weird things in stuff. Mom says she use to love this cereal called Grape-Nuts, which we think sounds gross. She said you told her one time people saved up all their grape seeds to put in the box. Do they really?? We hate grape seeds, but we don’t mind saving them if someone wants to buy them.
Did you know people eat kangaroo & wallaby here? It’s true, we saw it in the shop. We poked it too, to see if it felt like real meat or not, but then Mom said to cut it out because she could barely breath and didn’t want to waste her last breaths on telling us to stop poking the kangaroos. We wanted to tell her it was just sausages, but she looked a little green so we decided not to.
We all ready told Gram-Gram, but we just want you to know we got the joke book. We think it’s really funny. So, we want to ask you what happens when you put your hat in the Red Sea. It won’t turn red, it just gets what. Except we think it might get red if it touches the red algae, but the joke says it won’t so we’ll have to experiment on it if we ever go to the Red Sea for vacation.
It’s nearly past our bedtime now so Mom says we should end this letter. We’d rather stay up late and watch for the whale or play games, but we’re afraid of the dark and since Mom said she’s turning out the lights we’ve decided to end our letter.
Happy Father’s Day Poppy. 

from all of us

P.S. Mom says Happy Father's Day too and that she loves you. She also says that the poem clearly states that the peas and honey aren't tasty, but we've asked her not to finish the poem because we really have to get to bed.

P.P.S. She finished the poem anyway.


Sheryll said...

I am an American who moved to Australia almost two years ago. We live in Victoria and are a homeschooling family as well. Thought I'd pass this along:

They are located in Melbourne but they do ship nationwide. They have Grapenuts. :) It is fun to browse the site and exclaim over all the brands I recognize. I mean recognise. I am so desperate for some black beans that I just may place an order!

Kendra said...

I've seen them but never ordered! I always "mean to" but never do. Do you have an IGA near by? We have one IGA who carries blackbeans in a tin! They are pricey, but man it's worth it sometimes. One of the health food stores near-by sells dried ones so I can stock up that way sometimes too.. Now for a bowl of cream of wheat.. haha