Monday, March 21, 2011

Things I've learned while Moving

The past few weekends we’ve been helping my mother-in-law move into her wonderful new abode. It’s been a lot of work, and I’ve learned several things along the way:

  • I am still scared of spiders, but not so much that I can’t suggest we pick up the dead ones to investigate them. All though looking at a huntsman under a microscope might unhinge me.
  • I am not nearly as afraid of spiders as I am of lizards. Especially ones without tails. Or dark icky ones. Or ones that pop out from under boxes you are carrying causing you to scream, and possibly drop the box praying beyond believe that A, the lizard doesn’t kill you and B, the box survived the lizard too.
  • My arms aren’t as entirely weak as I thought they were. After all, if I can carry an entire kitchen cupboard on my own I can’t be that bad off right? Don’t ask me why we moved kitchen cupboards, but we did, and lifting two out of my car and placing them in the garage alone was worth a moment of celebration.
  • Chaos and clutter, regardless of the need, still send me into a tail wind of, “OH MY WORD! This mess must be cleaned up now.” I can’t handle either, even when they aren’t mine.
  • Men, no matter how old, should never be left alone with a remote control. Especially if said remote control can lift over 500lbs and is an excuse not to carry more boxes. 
  • Never, ever suggest that someone carry you, with a box in your arms, on the dolly to the truck. Chances are they’ll take you seriously and you’ll scream like crazy for fear of falling off. 
  • Bull Ants still send me running for the hills when they glare at me. Nothing like a 1-inch long and snapping his pinchers at you to clear a moving van. 
  • No matter how long they’ve been sitting in the same place, Grandpa’s boots suddenly appearing out of thin air make me cry. Seeing one of Nana’s boots appear out of thin air makes you laugh.
  • Moving is something one should only two once, maybe twice in a lifetime. I’ve met my quota, so I should be good for this lifetime. You know that’s a sure sign I’m going to have move now, don’t you?
  • Pulling mail out of a post box and jumping up and down on top of it to kill sugar ants makes the people closest to you laugh while those inside are pretty sure you’ve just pulled a letter from the IRS, INS, or even ANZ out of the box.
  • Even the most minute item can tell a story in the hands of the right person. However, a picture of said item and a well written version of said story are a lot easier to move.
  • One should never empty all items, like toilet rolls, from the bathroom when you need to return the following weekend to finish the job of moving items. 
  • Duct tape is awesome! McGuyver knew his stuff. Packing tape, not so awesome.
  • Everyone wants to move on a holiday weekend.
  • If your significant other stumbles upon a box of old school “treasures” he’s going to tell you all about them, but if he’s all ready made an international move he’s likely to chuck them out afterwards.
  • I am most assuredly not a pack rat. I most assuredly will not become one. 
  • If My parents ever decide to move from their current home and I help them, I’m hiring a dumpster to be on the spot {Sorry Mom & Dad, but trust me you’ll thank me in the end! Ps, I won’t let you take the milking stand or any other piece of barn equipment you’ll never use again either..}
  •  It is possible to have science experiments growing in your fridge and be in total awe by them.. even if a little bit grossed out all at the same time. Did you know there are a bajillion different kinds of fungi that can grow in there? Very awesome, wish I’d had my Eye Clops!
  • Never leave children, no matter how old or young, alone with a remote control. Unless you want to entertain them for free while you brake your back moving a bed or two..
  • Watching relatives move gigantic appliances still freaks me out. I can’t watch, I simply listen for the scream of agony while my finger is one stroke away from calling emergency services.
  • Never forget to take your allergy pills before moving. If there’s dust it’ll find you.
  • There are weight limits to what a robotical trash truck arm can lift. 
  • Sometimes, it’s really hard to have a “Ruth Like” attitude instead of an “Oprah like” one. 
  • Toilet Brushes can cause a whole lotta laughter.. in the right hands.
  • If no one I know never moves again, that might just be too soon for me!

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