Friday, April 16, 2010

Little Boys

This week, while I was making dinner the boys decided to play "good guy, bad guy". This usually entails someone arresting the other one and "locking them up" for a while. Sometimes the "bad guy" has to sit in front of the heater or the fire place while being tied to a chair. Apparently the idea is to make them "sweat", literally. I guess my kids don't get the whole "sweat it out" terminology.  They've also been known to make each other sit, tied up, on the couch where they will be forced to watch "girlie" shows until they promise to behave, I like this one, but apparently they are only speaking figuratively because when I ask if we can watch something like Angelina Ballerina or Holly Hobby they run off screaming. The list of insanity goes on. So, this past week when they were playing this game I wasn't giving it too much thought, but when I turned around to rinse off some broccoli I noticed Morgan coming in the kitchen.
He was pleased as punch when he announced he'd "chained" himself up and even managed to lock it. I look at him for a minute and then I said, "Morgan, do you even know where the key to that lock is?" He pauses for a moment and then says, "No!" "Well, how are you going to get that chain off yourself?" "I hadn't really thought about it Mom, but I'm sure it'll be okay." So I stand there and watch him attempt to slip the chain off of himself. Morgan is all skin and bone and always has been, but there was no slipping that off.  He tried to shove it off by going farther up with it, and then tried to drag it down. He only managed to dislodge his shirt and nearly lost his pants. That is when his panic levels started to rise.

My first response was, "Well if I have to take you to the Police Department to get that off  you can do all the explaining of why it's on there." He laughs for a minute and then says, "Will they put me in jail?" "Probably not, I mean it isn't like locking yourself up is bad or anything." "So, I won't be in trouble?" "No, but they might have to use a saw to get it off you." Yeah, me in my broccoli induced stupor is considering the need to have the lock cut off. Then I remember the chain is merely plastic and that we just purchased a hacksaw for making those fun marshmallow shooters.

And this my friends was the cheesy grin on his face about two seconds before he burst into tears! He was completely freaked out by the thought of us using the saw. Now, mind you it's a teeny tiny hack saw. That chain on his tum is made from plastic and is suppose to be for holding stuffed animals, as you can see it doesn't hold stuffed animals very often. In fact, the stuffed animals are usually being quite naughty and are made to suffer at the hands of the law in one way or another as mentioned above. Those who don't comply with such punishments (as in they actually like to sit with Mom and watch girlie movies) are turned into secret agent spies.

Two minutes later I heard Mr Scarecrow say, "Right, don't move okay? Whatever you do just don't move!" To which Morgan says, "I hope I can hold my breath that long!" He still takes everything very literally...

Let's just say he tested the next lock before he tied his brother to the kitchen chair and told him he was going to make him "sweat it out in front of the heater for 2 days!" As for me, I now have a spare set of keys to some unknown lock hanging on the family bulletin board. The chances of them actually opening up the lock in question next time are pretty slim, but apparently it brings relief to some to know that there's a spare set of keys hanging there.


Susan said...

I love your blog! I discovered it through the sheep lapbook, and now I'm hooked. As a mom of two boys, I especially loved the story about the boys chaining themselves up and being forced to watch "girly" movies. My two are hitting the age now where "girly" is one of the biggest put-downs around, and Barbie and pink are to be sneared at.

Erin said...

I laughed and laughed at this. reminds me of the sort of stunts my brothers used to do.